I’m still adjusting to my new normal, and I have to be honest, it’s been hard. Why me? Why now? All the feelings we go through when life takes an unexpected hard left turn. And just before Christmas and New Years, when we are supposed to be filled with optimism for the year ahead.
I’ve got a lifelong journey ahead of me, and my mind keeps racing, thinking of how my diagnosis is going to change so much that I had planned. On a day-to-day level, and for all the years and years to (hopefully) come.
My diagnosis feels like a pack of wolves chasing me, and I have to keep running to stay ahead – or else I could die. Reading through the big scary list of health complications and ways this thing could kill me? Not probably the best idea right now, but I need to know. I need to know what’s chasing me so I can stay one step ahead.
One step ahead, one step ahead. Instead of the wolves, I’m trying to look at my steps ahead with purpose, not panic. I’m not doing a great job of that right now, but with time, hopefully I’ll get there.
One day at a time, one step at a time.